Ill be just fine,

Pretending im not,

Im far from lonely,

And its all that ive got.

So ive just decided that the wind down of 2009 is gonna be a long process and is gonna start now :).

This year has been full of moments that have changed me for better and worse.

Its been a crazy year.

Best and worse year so far.

Things are so much different then a year ago.

This year ive lived in three diffent houses, and accumulated a new family, lost so much and gained so much more.

Life is a crazy ride and its not always fun.

2010 will be fun but 09, i will always remember.

Sums up my year.

Im free.

So exams are over, and now i have 2 months of holidays.

Finally.

Now i can worry about things that really matter.

And now i just cant wait for aus.

So keen.

Where would we be without everyone weve ever met.

A man can be happy with any women as long as he does not love her.

Experience is the name we give to our mistakes.

Yoooo.

Its been like. A week and a half.

On study leave :D.

Still havnt studied tho.

Went to Newmarket after school finished yesterday.

Fun fun.

I have 5 exams and they finish in exactly two weeks.

I dont want to know how fucked my body is gonna be after the weekend after my last exam. :P

Anyway.

Bedtime. Start studying tomoro :)

November-November.

Its been more or less a year since it all of this started.

And im officially over it.

Today, like every tuesday, i went to my sisters to wait to be picked up.

Usually we are all happy families and shit.

But for once, we fought.

And i am pretty much outlawed from everybody in my family except my mum.

Screw it.

Sup.

So ah,

My weekend has certainly been eventful.

Pretty fun actually.

My liver definitly needs atleast a month to recover tho :P.

Friday i went to sammys drinks which was hilarious.

Lay on the tramp with rosie for about, an hour naming stars.

I only remember brightie, danny, the dark side of the moon and raymond.

I dont know how much i drank.

But i stole atleast a half of seans litre of smirnoff.

Saturday i went to tims and played games.

Gaaansgter.

It was pretty fun actually.

Sunday i went to alexs bday drinks.

It was fun.

Drank a whole bottle of kristov. Was rather fucked.

Today i went to see my dad.

It was good.

Interesting tho..

Anyway,

All up it was a very good weekend.

Cant wait until after exams when it will be like that all the time.

Hardly ever going home :P

"Now would you
Love me, if I was crazy
Girl, I'm going crazy for you
I'm crazy for you
Lets waste away together
We can stay this way forever"

Young-The Summer Set

11:11

If only you knew what my wish was..

This shit,

Its fun

:D

Are you happy?

Today i saw my grandad for the first time in exactly.. 3 months and 4 days.

Last time i saw him was the morning that I was getting shit for "leaving" my dads and got a good talking to by my whole family. Hrmm.

But anyway,

Today when i saw him he asked me if i was happy now and i said yea, im alot happier living with Jo, Glenn and Braiden.

So it made me realise that happiness is the only thing that matters.

If your not happy with what your doing, or where your going, or who your with, Then its time to fuck it.

If only i had known this before shit had got bad.

Procrastination.

I suffer from being extremely good at procrastinating.

I had the whole holidays to read 5 books, draw two graphs, and write 10 pages of information on the graphs.

But no.

I decide to leave it till the night before its due.

Whoops.

Classic 16 year old behaviour i guess tho :)

SUP PEOPLE!

Hey so im extremely under the influence right now, hows life?

So today was my dads 53rd birthday, and its been about, 3 and a half months since ive seen him, and in the morning i have to see him.

Fuck.

At the drinks i just got home from i kept on asking people what to say to him. My new friend tom told me to say sorry even if i didnt mean it. And even tho i dont mean it i think i will say it.

I mean,

I could have atleast called him since i moved out. Its fucked. I feel bad.

But hes the one who attacked me so fuck him.

But im gonna see him so its all good.

And im gonna be so fucking hungover when i see him so its gonna be crack up.

Ill blog after i see him :). laters xxxx

"Save your heart
For someone who leaves you breathless
And I know that you're scared
Seems like someone said you had it in you
All along you said you knew this was wrong
But still worth dying for"

Save Your Heart-Mayday Parade

Got the picture yet?

"So I'll sing a melody
And hope to God she's listening
Sleeping softly while I sing
And I'll be your memories
Your lullaby for all the times
Hoping that my voice could get it right"

I Swear This Time I Mean It-Mayday Parade

11:57

So right now ive got a cat lying to the side of my keyboard which is making it rather had to write.

These holidays are sadly going faster than imagined and it sucks hard.
I really wish that they would so down!

And i also really dont like the memories coming back from last holidays.

There are actually so many.

Like the middle sunday was when i went into town with Ash to get something.

And then on the monday went to tims.

One thing i do like though, is how easy its getting to carry on.

Its been 3 months.

And theres still that one image in my head.

It seriously is never going to go away.. And i hate it.

Great Start To The Holidays.

This weekend has possibly been the best weekend this year.

One thing that also made it better was the fact it was the start of the holidays.

And now im not complaining that its sunday which is the best feeling.

Friday started off with Tes's sixteenth, ive known Tes since i was born, which was good.

Was on the meannest buzz all night. Walking round smiling :P.

Talked to a couple of people.

Met some people that ive herd shit loads about but never met.

Saturday started off with a hangover and db.

I dont really remember the day but im very glad sammy invited me to sean's.

We got to sammys and had an epic walk to glover park. Started drinking on the way.

Met up with my sister and her sammy. Played circle of death for a bit. Drank some wine.

Had about a bottle and a half. Then a couple of shots of 42 below to top it off.

Pretty fucked. Then the walk home at 2 was fun :P.

Met up with alice and sammy for the walk home. They were pretty fucked.

So sammy decides that his pants are annoying him so just casually takes them off. Interesting.

Today has been full of sleeping. Interneting. And yea.

Have a pretty bad hangover. But atleast i have 2 weeks to recover :P.

Should've, Would've, Could've.

2 and a half months down the track and im still thinking about what i would be doing right now if i had just straight up left.

If i had gone to st heliars with chris after school.

If i hadnt gone upstairs.

If i had reacted differently.

If i had said that one thing.

If one thing had been done differently would i be here right now.

Would i be writing this.

Would i still be feeling like shit day after day.

Lately ive been worrying about whats going to happen next year.

And i still have no idea where im going to be.

But one thing im glad about, is now its just me.

No more worrying about everyone else.

"Your eyes are the only stars i want to see
your lips is the only air i want to breath
so please tell me that i'm asking for too much
because there's so much of myself that i've given up"

All Or Nothing-Hit The Lights.

Kill me, Now please.

So this is the second day, in a row, that ive had for study leave.

Except study cant probably be included in the list of things that ive done.

Tomoro i have the last two of my exams, Accounting and Geo.

Accounting im probably gonna fail seeing as in the mid years i wrote just my name.

Geo, i might pass if i stay up till atleast one tonight.

Fuck.

Mayb not studying wasnt the smartest thing to do :P.

But as soon as exams are over im off to big bay with a group of people for two nights.

I seriously dont think i will ever recover from the hangover from the nights.

And i think that i will always be downbuzz after it :P.

So keen.

Two Things.

There is two things i wish i could do right now.

1: See you.
2: Make all of this end.

"Don’t say goodbye
Cause I don’t wanna hear those words tonight
Cause maybe it’s not the end for you and I
And although we knew
This time would come for me and you
Don’t say anything tonight
If you’re gonna say goodbye"

Say Goodbye-Skillet

Its so much easier when you only have to worry about yourself.
When theres noone that is asking you for something.
Asking you to do something.
Its so much easier just living for yourself.
Not having to care for anyone else.
I know that it makes it more fun.
But right now,
I couldnt care less.

So exams start on friday.
Havnt started studying.
Im fucked for pretty much all of them.
But ive alredy passed level 2 so meh.

Life just gets better and better.

Note: Im not being sarcastic for once :P.

Today is fathers day.
And, its strange.
I never used to remember when fathers day was.
But now, even tho i dont have a dad, i rememberd.

Im not too keen for school tomoro.
The phrase "Gillies is a slut!" might get chucked around abit.

Also, i learnt last night to never use a can.
Bad idea.

Anyway. More sleep.
Still downbuzzing.

Buzzy.

Woooo.
Just woke up and im feeling rather average.
Which sucks hard.
I drank like, 3.

Bitchass.

Rosies was gaaaaangster.
First time ive met her.

Anyway. I gotta sleep some more.
Sleep this shittyness off. :(

So i just got home from an epic night.
Partially under the influence of i dont know what.

It was actually one of the best nights tho.
Saw the scariest movie of my life.
And then got some hilarious videos.

Im so glad i dont live with my parents.

But this sunday will either be really hard, or really awkward.

Gaaaaansgster.

Spring is here.
Which is good coz it means summer is that much closer.

Im so keen for this term to finish.
And hopefully these holidays will be as good as last.

This week has been pretty good.
Very relaxed actually.

Best thing about it being closer to summer is the 3 next best dates.
21st sep: Jew from christchurch.
Nov: Year 12 is over :)
26th Dec: AUS!!!

Anyway.
I have to finish my film seminar.

This shits mean.

As my facebook status says: "Only Gaaaaaangsters are on facebook at 11:35 on friday nights".
So true.

This week has been mean.
Two days off school for being sick.
Still sick now tho, Sucks hard.

Lubas 18th tomoro night.
Should be good.
I think the night will consist of a few trips to maccas.

Anyway.
Time to.
Finish blogging.
Laterrrrrs.

Last time,
Was different.

Last time,
Was easy.

This time is impossible.
Just glad your happy.

I cant cope.

This sucks hard.

Camp.

Camp was actually amazing.
One of the best weeks ever.

Day 1, Monday:
Got up at 5:30 to get to school by 6.
Waited till 7 at school for the bus.
Drove to waitomo where we went caving in some random farm.
"Rocks Are Made Of Water!", Quote by Flo.
Then got to the campsite and partied till tuesday :P.

Day 2, Tuesday:
Woke up at 7 to go to the mountain.
Went up the mountain and tramped for about an hour until we found somewhere to have lunch.
While other people built snow caves, Alice, Caitlin, Leah, Sean and I went with Steve to go climb ice walls. That was mean.
We got to slide down almost vertical cliffs that were about 100 meters high.

Day 3, Wednesday:
We got up at 7 again to go rafting.
Coldest thing ive done in my whole life.
Leah ended up falling out of the raft when we went down the air new zealand rapid which was hilarious. The stuff coogs said :P.
We also had a DNM with our meeeeean ass instructer Kyle about relationships.

Day 4, Thursday:
7oclock again :P.
Our half of the class went up the mountain to go skiing.
That was probably the best day.
I did bail very bad.
Except for my epic superman on happy valley.

Day 5, Friday:
Went skiing again. Whole class this time.
I went straight out to the west side with Leah, Alice and Sean.
This was funny.
I ditched them and ended up on the top of a massive cliff with seriously no way to get down.
Ended up taking the steepest way. :P.
Friday was probably the worst day as we all knew we had to leave camp.

Now im home.
Memories of camp coming back everytime i look at something that reminds me of it.
And it sucks because camp was rather carefree, but now im back, and there is still some things i dont know what to do about.

But for nowwww.
Lattttters :)

Change it to love?

I know you tried,
But it wasnt the best way to get it through to me.
Youll always be the same.
And everyone knows it.
I just want u to know im not ready.

You went,
You couldve stayed.
Since ive remembered,
Youve always ment the most to me.

My weekend was good.
Went to the Versace hotel for lunch on saturday.
Boring flight home sunday.
Then packing and shit for camp.

I think i gotta go, Finish packing.
Cyaaaaaa :)

If only people let me.

I never realised how much i missed her until now.

Im over being told what im supposed to do.
Richard is pretty chucking the whole "its your choice" thing out the window.
I had enough of being told what to do when i was living with my dad.
Im over this shit.
Its making me less and less sure of what i eventually do want to do.


Back to Nz tomoro.
Not keen to get back to shitty weather seeing as ive had sun and hotness :P.
And then i go to the snow on monday. This should be entertaining :).

Its almost a month since i talked to my dad.
I still dont think he has the picture yet tho.
And i dont think i will ever go back there.
I just guess i have a new family at Braidens.

Anyway. We are going out again. Not sure where.
So cyaaaa :)

So im sitting here,
In Australia,
In the room,
On blogger,
Listening to Keeping Up With The Joneses by Medic Droid,
Drinking Coke-Zero,
Wondering what comes next.
Where i go from here.
Whats gonna happen after next week.

Its weird.
Because when i plan stuff really throughly, i cant see anything happening after then.
Its like, end of that is the cut of day of this.

Right now im in Aus.
Today was good.
Alot better than Nz i heard.
We went onto the beach and i had everything i needed except for catherine :P.

But before the beach, me nd my mum went to a shopping center called pacific fair.
This was good.
I also found out that shes still smoking.
Which was a surprise.
But i felt extremely hipocritcal telling her she shouldnt be.

Tomoro its her birthday.
It will be good.
Im just happy i can be here for it.
I dont want to leave on sunday.
I just want everyone to come over here.
Or here to come back to Nz.
Because this shit sucks.

Why.

Why did she have to go.
Why did he have to do that.
Why are they like that.
Why is all of this happening.

This is only a few of the little questions running through my mind.

So the next week and a bit is gonna be crazy.

In 2 days im going to aus for the second time this year to see my mum for her birthday.
I think that will be good.
Im actually pretty keen to see her and richard again.
And it will also be a little break from shit here.

Straight after i get back from aus, the next day, i go on a 5 day camp for outdoor ed.
Im gonna be so tired.
But i think its gonna be a good week.

And for now.
I have to go.
Bye bye bye :)

Im over this now.
Its got to the point where its just stupid.
You dont see what this is doing to me.


The past 3 weekends have been the best of my life.
Tonight will hopefully be good.
And next weekend will top it off.
Mayb i wont be made to come home.
Hopefully.

Every friday is usually a good friday and luckily today was no exception.

I woke up late :P.
But now thats pretty much what happens everyday.
I got the bus to school and it warmed up.
I saw chris which was funny as he helped me realise the funniest thing.

I then got to leave school early.
Then to home and hung out for about an hour at home until kj came and dropped some stuff off.
So keen to have some now.
I then went out to dinner with my new "parents".
And im drunk for the third friday in a row.
:P.
This is amazing.
How much better stuff is now im living with people i like.
I just wish i had moved in with them sooner.

Im pretty keen for this weekend.
But not so keen for monday.
Supposed to be starting my promise. Hope its easier than people say.

Anyway.
Might be going out now so see u soon :)

Would you mind.?

Stop pretending that it doesnt hurt you like this.
And lets go back.

Why cant we just leave this

Youve made it clear enough now.

I have this feeling.
And its not a negative feeling.
Its rather positive actually.
I dont think i care anymore.

You made it easy to forget you.
Thanks for that.
I guess u wont see it for awhile.

They made me realise this is what i want.
And i like it now.

See you soon.

Family. How amazing is this.

I just want to know what u want..
Nothing else.
This is impossible.
Please help me.
I dont know what to do.
And its killing me..

It sucks when what used to mean the most,
Now doesnt even mean anything.

"One more month
And all I need is a sign from you that you think of me
If you don't
Then please just say so
Cause all I do
Is think of you"

30days- Nevershoutnever!

I wish i could forget..

This is the everything i never wanted.
But everything i did want never mattered.*
And im starting to see that this is easy.
I just have to realise that it doesnt matter.*

The worst thing about this,
Is i cant tell you i love you anymore..

Things never go in anyones favour..
They may for awhile..
But nothing lasts forever.

When everything screws up why does the one other thing that keeps u going have to end..

This shit sucks.

There is seriously no words to describe this one..
The past couple of weeks have been filled with fuck up after fuck up.
But this one.. mm.
Ive been told several times by a friend that whenever stuff is bad for me, i always find a way to make it worse.
I could never say its been as true as it is right now.

Now it turns out that im going to aus for a weekend soon.
I think it will be good.

But to top it all off.
I have no lighter.

Time to die..

In the past two weeks ive experianced stuff that has changed me for life.
2 weeks ago today, my life changed. My dad came barging in, kicked me out of the house and lied about what had happened. Even though i knew the relationship with one of my parents was over, i still had one of the best nights ever.
I spent the day at my mums with my sister Alice and her boyfriend Sammy.
I then got dropped off at my friend Jeannis at about 7pm. I walked home and my dad wasnt home so i went inside.
I then had an epic walk in the rain from my dads, to the alcohol shop at allum street, and then back down the hill and around the waterfront to st heliars. I then got picked up by kj and richard where we went to churchill park and then to Michelles house. That was a funny night. I ended up spending the night at adils. A persons whos house i would never think i would stay at.
The next day was spent getting rid of the munchies at kjs house. Then off on another funny night. Which ended extremely badly.
I ended up going home for the first time since id been kicked out. I couldnt have been dropped off at a worse time tho. My sister was having her 20th birthday party.

The next day was shit.
Even though i was supposed to go see catherine because it was the first day she was back, i couldnt.

The next day was even worse.
I ended up pretty much getting attacked by my dad.
I guess its a good thing. I now know what he is really like.

The next week was spent sleeping on the couch at my best friend braidens house.
And the st cuths ball in the weekend which was the best night ever.

And now its friday. Night before the Glendowie Ball.
Im drinking with braiden again like last week.
I havnt spoken to my dad for 10 days now.
And i have a feeling i wont be talking to him for awhile.

Anyway.
The past two weeks have been the best and worst two weeks of my life.
But enough about that.
Back to drinking.
Have a good night :).

So..
Turns out im moving in with my mate braiden.
This should be an interesting year.

If i had to compare last night with last saturday then last saturday was the worst night of my life and last night was the best night.

I now havnt talked to my dad in 5 days.
And i have no idea when i will see or talk to him again. Meh.

Im just keen for next weekend.
Another ball should be good :).

A year ago i wouldnt have guessed that my life would be like this.

My mum hadnt met richard.
I hadnt met Catherine.
I didnt know the "other" side of my dad.
I hardly knew Elaine.

I wish i could say the the past year has been the best year.
But theres only two things i can say im glad that have happened in the past year.
-Catherine.
-My mum being happy with richard.

If only those could have happened and nothing else changed.
But yet again, "if only" is the start of that sentence...

You may think about whats going to happen in the future, maybe 10-20 years from now.
And whats going to happen when you grow up.

But you never think about whats going to change in the next month.

Ok, Fuck it.

Im sick of this shit.

Its the subtle things that end up making the difference.

I decided i needa change.
I guess thats a little generic considering the people i usually hang out with at school.
But this is different.
Its more a life than a personality change.
I guess personality could help a little too but that has to wait.

I dont know where to start, But family might be a good idea.

Right Now.

Right now i have no idea what is going to happen.
There is so much that could, and alot of that i dont want to happen.
But depending on what happens, I will always be there for the people i care about.

I havnt talked to my dad for more than 24 hours now.
I guess thats a good thing seeing as its not "safe" for me to be alone with him.
It will probably be another 4 or 5 days until i do talk to him again.
I just dont want anything to turn out how it did with him and my sister.

I was reading something the other day and it said,
"You look so hard to find a reason to leave, and when a reason finally turns up, theres something that makes you want to stay".
Its exactly the way i feel right now.
And the way i have felt for almost 4 months now.

I dont know what he thinks he can change,
But i know for certain that he cant change yet.

I have no idea..

I swear i have lost all direction.

I have no idea what to do.

I have no idea where to go from here.

I know i cant blame my mum for all this, But if it wasnt for her leaving then none of this would have ever happened.

I hate some stuff for happening.

It made me who i never wanted to be.

But then again.

I love some things for happening.

And will remember them forever.

And love the people forever.

Ive never experianced life like this.

I hope i never have to experiance it like this again.

But until i sort shit out with my dad and the rest of my family,

then it will be like this forever.

I hope what im holding is good.

Because im not letting go.

I fucked up..
Probably the worst ive ever fucked up..
And now i have no idea what to do..
I cant even say sorry to half the people..
And the one person that does matter,
Hardly realises how much i do love her..

I just want to go back to the start of the holidays.
There is so much i want to change.
But no point feeling sorry for myself..

Its currently 6:38 pm on the second and last thursday of the holidays.
I just got back from the new Harry Potter movie with my sister. It was good.
When i got home. My report was sitting in the mail.
Its now open and scattered over the table.
I am dredding the moment my dad finally walks in the door.

I can see me ending up at Alex or Jeanni's tonight.
Preferably neither.
But with the state of my report.
It will probly end up in a fight.

Which sucks because it kills my seemingly perfect day.

Woke up later then was supposed to (like always) :P. at 10 when i was suppiosed to be at alex's at 10:15. Quick shower. Walked there. Went to get Jeanni and Miho.
Turned up at Tsveti's. Even tho it was supposed to be a "surprise" party. The birthday girl showed up first.
Tsveti had made pancakes and we put Blood Sugar by Pendulum on which has surprisingly good bass.
Steven, Ari, Pari and Elleshia showed up.
Miho and Jeanni decided it would be a good idea to go to Gi in the boot of Stevens car. Bad idea.
Me and Elleshia then walked to hers and i finally got the photos id been wanting for about 6 months now.
I then walked home and then went to see Harry Potter.
All up a good day.

Sucks that it will be ruined.
But i better go.
Have a good night :)

So much for that..

So much for not staying up past one tonight :P
So much for not going to churchill park with richard and kj again today.
So much for giving a fuck.

I love imgfave.com
It has photos that are so true.
Like these:

Have you ever had the feeling when you cannot be fucked anymore? With anything?

Coz I have that feeling right now.

Last night was rather interesting.
Had an epic adventure through cornwall park where tim bailed extremely badly.
Cut his lip outside and inside. Looked so bad.
We went back to his then adventured back out to miccy d's at greenlane.
Funny times there.

Anyway.
Now im home and my dad decided he wants to make my room massive by demolishing the wall inbetween the two rooms. And he wants me to help.
I cant be fuckkkked. I want to sleep. So tired.

But i better go help him.
See u soooon. :)

Life has a way of fucking you up.

Is it just me..?

Or does everyone have a million problems in their life right now?

At the start of 09, i was asked if i wanted to move to australia.
I couldnt think of anything i wanted to do less.
But now, Just over half way through the year.
I cant think of anything that makes me want to stay in new zealand.

Im back in NZ :).
Australia turned out to be pretty good. Richard is almost all good now. I saw my mum. And me nd braiden had a rave with mr soapy soap. :P

But now back in nz stuff is screwed.
My laptop is fucked.
People are being dicks.
Feels like no one gives a shit right now.

But anyway. I had a pretty sweet morning.
Got dropped off at about 12 45am.
My dad wasnt home and i had no key so i had to break into my own house.
Which is actually extremely easy. Im surprised we havnt been robbed.

But i should probably go.
Its 12 33 pm and im still in bed.
Laterrrrs :)

Aus.

YOOO!
Last night in aus.
Pretty keen for flight home :)
Been a good week.
Havnt blogged in awhile.

Dreamworld was funny shittt.
And whitewater world was funny.
Me nd braiden were cold so we wanted to find the spas. no spa.
SO!
We went to the disabled toilets. Had a hot shower.
F*ck yea.

Today.
Had an epic trip to 'Condom Kingdom'.
Some mean photos with a giant orange condom.
:)

I also found a mean band.
'NeverShoutNever!'.
30 Days is a good song by them. u should get itttt.

Anyway.
I have to get off the interwebs.
Laterrrrs.
Next time i blog ill be in NZ :)

Australia.
Been pretty good so far. Richard is getting better. Not so much of a faggg.
My mum nd him are STILL hinting at me moving to australia to live with them. Not keen.


Dreamworld today.
Was pretty sweet!
We are the shit.
Went on the spongebob flying shit.
Braiden: "This is pretty lame"
Will: "Shut the fuck up, its awesome" :P
Spinny chairs :D (i think we really annoyed the girl running it)
Tried to go on the merri-go-round. But no.

Im actually not starting to be keen for going home.
Hopefully my report hasnt come..
I can see the fights me and my dad will get in..
I really hope jeanni ends up coming home on saturday.
And i wish Catherine was back :(.

Anyway!
Its 10:30(aus time) and i am tired as from today, and we are back to there again tomoro to go to the water park. so i better go.
Cya Sooooon. :)

Good Afternoon :).
If you didnt know.
Im in Australia.

Me and braiden just got home from our epic walk.
We walked to some shop.
Then back through the college then along some road, up some road, to a park, got lost.
Then found our way home. :).

We bought the meanest shit at the shops today and at the shop me and braiden went to.

Today.
I got a mean new jumper from jay jays.
New jeans from levis.
And a meannn assss jumper from fila.
We also got donut king. Best shit ever.

From mine and braidens epic walk we got mean shit too.
Gatorade.
LOL energy drink.
Pulse gum.
Reese's peanut butter cups (CARAMEL).
AND!
Cadbury snack bar.

Not keen for tomoro. Going to some gay ass markets.

But lol.
I love the song "I Shake, I Move" by LMFAO.
We on the dance floor, light it up like a candle.

But oii.
Missing catherine :(.

Yo yo yo.

Currently sitting on the plane. With braiden playing tetris. Me writing in word. For my blog.

He says “Hi yaaaa (in a gay voice)”

I have no idea how long we have been in the air. And i don’t know how much longer we have on the plane. Apparently the flight attendant is an ex-shortland street actor. But we don’t know who the f**k she was so meh.

We are turning atm. It feels weird as fuckkkk.

Now we be shaking.

Baby get shaky on the plane! Wowow

I really want to know how much longer we have left. But i cant see anything but fucking clouds.

And lol. The dude on the end of our row is sleeping. So keen to draw on his face.

And oiiii. Catherine. You didn’t even text back when i sent u the last text. >=[.

Braiden is a nosy motherfucker. Hes reading this.

Whore.

Flying feels real weird.

And oiii. I see land. But apparently we have an hour left. Mofos.

I am keen to listen to some a song with hard out bass.

Hrmm.

Frick i miss Catherine alredy. Well, i have since last night after she left. But like. Alot now.

:(

AND OMFG!!!!!!

FUCKING MICROSOFT WORD HAS FRICKEN SMILEYS!!!!!

Sorry. I just buzzed out over the smileys :P.

Frick i wanna get off this plane and go on msn.Talk to people/person.

ANYWAY!

I page of Microsoft word is up. Later bitches.

:)

:(

Just said good bye to Catherine. :(.
Either kill me now or put me to sleep for two weeks.

Tomoro, i go to australia.
Gonna be a freaking party.
Not.
Even though im going with my best friend Braiden, it probly will not be as good as i would hope.
I mean, i cant talk to Catherine and i have to spend a week in the same house as .. yep.

its 10:20, 11 hours and 40 mins before im getting picked up. STILL havnt finished packing. Some of my stuff is still being washed or dryed.
Im fucked.

ANYWAY!
Not keen for tomoro. 3 pm.
Have to say good bye to Catherine for two weeks :(.

Anyway, I probably should finish packing.
Talk later :)

Here i am again.
In the ict lab. Pretending to do my english internal.
I have this period to finish it seeing as i dont have english tomoro and im not at school on friday.
Im screwed.

Its my fault tho.
I think i spent about 5 hours on this one site last night. (www.imgfave.com or something)
Haha. Catherine did too :P.

And now im on it again in english.
Im retarded.

But OH EM GEE!
Its the first of july.
2 days till 3 months :)
2 days till australia.
9 days till alices birthday.

Hopefully July will be better than June.
As for nowww.
Just waiting for thursday :)

Well, Currently, Im sitting in the schools ict lab.
I look like im doing my english formal writing internal, but im fooling my bitch of an english teacher.
For formal writing, we are doing a profile on someone.
I still havnt done my interview even though we should have had it done last monday.
My bad.
Meh.
Got to much to worry about.

Well!
Here i am on this pimping proxy.
Trying to hack my way onto my facebook account.
Sadly, its not working.
It will.

Anyway, I should probably try and make something up. Seeing as i have to hand something in by the end of this period.
See u laterrrr.

Im Just As Weird As You.

I want to find a song i can just buzz out to.
That i can sit there listening to it for hours.. days.. and not get sick of it.

YO YO YO!

Tonight will be able to be called one of the best nights ever.
I spent the whole night with Catherine (soz if i was clingy :P) except for when she left, then i was going crazy that she was gone.

Catherine: I love you sooooo much :) xxxx
Liv: Thank you for inviting me. Also. Ur welcome for ur note and the gift. :P if D didnt take it out.
Klazz: LOL@U!
Tess: Thanks for the lift gggg.
Anton: Your beautiful man! even tho u wont read this.

Livs was intense. gonna be some mean blogging in the morning when i wake up.
its 3:03 am atm. :P
I love you catherine :):)

later ggggeeeeezzzzzzzyyyyzzzzzz

Yoooo.
It is currently 10:48.
I am officially addicted to www.stumbleupon.com.
Watever you do. DONT download the toolbar.

I have found a good song by All Time Low.
Its called 'Remembering Sunday".
Second to last verse:
"The neighbors said she moved away
Funny how it rained all day
I didn't think much of it then
But it's starting to all make sense
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds
Are following me in my desperate endeavor
To find my whoever, wherever she may be".

My weekend was perrrrrty good.

Friday.
Wagged last two periods to hang with kj and scody.
Then Catherine came over. That made the week worth it. :)

Saturday i had my third driving lesson.
Then went to kathmandu and bought BRAND NEW thermals. Hells yea.
Then we went to Catherines and picked her up to go to my cousins 18th. It turned out to be good with her there.
We were under the stars for like. 30 seconds :P.

Then sunday.
I woke up early then went to have a shower then got picked up from Elaines by jeremy and emma to go and watch the socccer.
I now have a friend call sam.
Hes a stuffed moose.
After the soccer i had a rather eventful day. Stumbling and walking to alexs to theif some of her food.
Also!
My dad bought me cheese and bacon shapes then. HELLZ YEA!

But now school is back.
And life is back to shit.
My dad is gay. He just fuckkkks me off.
Not what he does. Just how he is.

But anyway! Stumbling is the new way of life.
Some meaaaan ass websites:
http://www.sketchswap.com/
http://gprime.net/images/sidewalkchalkguy/
http://www.spaceinvaders.de/
http://www.athey-educational.co.uk/games/game5/game5.htm
There will be more websites soon. :).
Sketchswap is probly the best. check that shit out.
:)
but i gotta go. its 11:06 pm.
Bye bye bye

HELLLO!

Havnt written in awhile.
Right now i am talking to Catherine about her epic butt-shuffling days :P.
And then partying with doors.

Today i was walking to school singing "im am not a whore" by "LMFAO" aloud, by myself. MLIA.

Its 11:54, and i just did a whore. (her name was Catherine) :P JOKESSS!

I found the awesomest band. Its called LMFAO. (as mentioned before)
And the song "Im In Miami Bitch" is meannnn. The best line is:
"She's got some big kahunas
But I say I'll be back gotta get some more Coronas"
:P.

Also. I wore thermals today. Love those shittttts.
FRICKKKK! Its 12. So i better gap it before i get smashed.
HAVE A GOOD NIGHT NEEEEGS!!.
Laters.

Today i couldnt think of anything to put on MLIA. So i decided to write on my blog seeing as less people would see it, making me seem like less of a loser. MLIA.

Meh.

Neeeeeegro.

I want a car.
I want v.
I want music.
I want my heater :P.
I want a job.

If anyone did eco in year nine or ten and learned about needs and wants then you would realise that everything i want is also what i need. :)

Yoooo.

Exams are gayyy shit.
But my dads even gayer :p

It was weird.
I get this text like half an hour ago from my bio bud josh.
And it says, "If Man Had No God.. Would He Invent One".
I dont know where the quote is from but it is perrrrty deep and gets you thinking.

Also.
I am currently still in bed at 1:11 in the afternoon seeing as Catherine thought it would be a good idea to give me a no doz at about 6 yesterday. I ended up not being able to sleep till 3 am! And i also started going crazy at her dinner table. :p.
Whoops.

Best song:
Lullaby by The Spill Canvas.
:)

later peeeeeeeps

I Love College.

Asher Roth is the shit.

Btws. I am addicted to blog. :P

And Bro.
Atm i do not love college.
Especially bio.
If you are like me and actually know about cells (hint Catherine) :P then you know how much there is actually about them.

Okay.
Well in bio. Im usually good. I listen. And sometimes get tutoring from my sister. And now studying cells. I remember how much there is.
Atm im looking at like a million wikipedia pages about the things in cells. Ribosomes, Flagellum, RNA, Golgi.
Its stupid. I try make notes on one thing like for example, I look at the wiki page for Ribosomes, and start making notes and then it comes up with a hyperlink to some other page, RNA on this one. Then i have to go make notes on another fricken thing, which then comes up with something else, this one being nucleotides.
This is gay.

Also.

Listen to the lyrics of "We All Roll Along" by The Maine.

Now back to looking at a million wiki pages to find out one thing.
Piece of gay.
BYE BYE BYE!

Blogggg.
Today i had two exams.
Maths was good. Txted my tutor to find out how to change something so it has positive indices. (Yes, Im awesome and have my tutors number)
Accounting was a fail. I knew it would be. I wrote my name. And not much else. :P.

Fully not ready for bio tomoro.
Who studys these days.
Frick.

And Omg.
I live in a two storied house.
My dad owns the house and we rent out the top story to what now is a leasbian couple.
For about 6 years a single lady has lived there. And about a week ago. Maybs more. Her partner moved in.

Im not enjoying the noises that are happening more and more frequently seeing as they seem to have moved their bed into the fricken lounge.
The worst thing about them, is that they are most probably the ugliest people in the world.
I swear i will eventually need therapy.

But!
Time to go get dinner and continue bio study.
Later nigggggers.

2 hours and 12 mins until my english exam.
It is going to be an extreme fail thanks to my dad who makes me go out to my dads girlfriends and stay up until 11 30 talking to her friends daughter and her friend.
Piece of ass.
I fully could have been studying for the exam but my dad is a whoreeeee.

Also!
Even though that completely killed any hint of a good mood im happy because since when i was walking to the waterfront to get the bus to the geography exam, i learned that my paint covered headphones still work! Im glad they did coz i wanted to listen to my new favourite band. Making April.

So now i dont have to worry about forgetting headphones at Catherines now :P

Anyway.
Im gonna go get into bed and try sleep for an hour before i have to go do my english exam.
Which is now in 2 hours and 6 mins.

Procrastinate.

BROOOOO!

Right now.
I am trying to study for my geo exam tomorow.
Not working.
I have made notes about evolution and change and then blogger is just. Begging me to write.
So f*ck it.
Im gonna write one :).

Today was a pointless day at school.
First: Did absolutely nothing.
Second: Continued to do absolutely nothing.
Double: Did one trial balance for accounting.
Fifth: Did one question out 3 pages we were supposed to do.
Sixth: We watched a gay documentary and then 5 mins of step brothers.

All in all. I didnt learn anything that i might need for the exams over the next 4 days.
Im screwed.

And!
Lol.
Listen to "Wow, I can get sexual too" by the band "Say Anything".
Maybe studying to this will help me get better marks in bio ;p.

I realy think i should keep studying. But i cannot be F****D.

Maybs i can procrastinate more by tidying my room seeing as its a fricken mess atm.
Well.
Off to do thattttt :)

BYE BYE BYE!

Blog Fiend-ing.

Ok.
I decided im becoming a blog fiend after not even a day.
Third blog ive written. It may be the fact that i have nothing to do. But meh.

And i just realised i always do somthing stupid the weekend before exams.
OK!.
Weekend before term 3 exams in 2008.
I went to a hotel party at "the oaks" and drank half a bottle of absolut vodka apple and 2 thirds of pepe lopez tequila.
And then turned up home off my face and with no shoes.
When i woke up that day i had to study for 6 hours.

Weekend before the REAL ncea end of year exams 2008.
I went to albert park. We all know wat happens in albert park.

Weekend before mid-years 2009.
Mayb ill explain after it settles down.
And the only person who knows wat happened on blogger is probs catherine so she can be special and know :P.
But im still fucking pissed we didnt get a photo camera whoring with the cops in the background.

Well.
Back to downbuzzing off no doz and study.
and 5:44 on sunday night.
home alone.
freakin parttttty.

Laterrrrr peopleeeeees

No Doz.

Well!
Tonight has been a night fueled by no doz and catherine :).

Never party in the tray of a ute going 130k around ellerslie/mt wellington.
I love cops that go easy on you.

Amusement=Scary shit.

Oh. and sadly no photos of the epic cop chase/walk home.

Shoving ashley in here. :) (her new name is fingers)

:P

Ni**er Fa**ot.

First Blog.
Hmm.

Short and sweet.
:).

Btws. Title=The joys of youtube.